Rest

Here's the spot I've camped out at over the last few days. As silly as it may seem, it's brought me joy to have all those colors and patterns on that black couch. It's the little things in life right? 

Yuck. Being sick is no fun at all. I can't remember feeling this bad in a long time. Partly it might be because I've never had a cold while being 9 months pregnant before. :) Hey, there's a first time for everything! One perk to this forceful respite was that I re-read the book Redeeming Love in a matter of a few days. What a good book! I rented it from the library in hopes of reading it once baby came and I had loads of down time, but the down time came before the baby so I dove right in! What a beautiful story of God's passionate love for us! This time around, I tried to put myself in the main character's, (Angel, a prostitute since age 8 who is given the chance at a new life by a loving man) shoes. There are so many times where she questions a love that expects nothing in return, a love that forgives and doesn't punish, and a love that is willing to lay down one's life for the sake of another. Her circumstances in life showed her that this love could not exist, so she hardened herself and ran away from a good and beautiful thing in order to protect herself. I've never done any of these things to the extreme she goes to, but in my relationship with the Lord I do tend to carry my baggage and see myself as an unworthy recipient of unceasing love. I do not approach his throne boldly like my legal position before Him gives me the ability to do. Instead, I look at the process of sanctification going on inside and say "I'm still unclean. This part of me isn't ready yet. There's no way you could love this area in my heart." What I must continue to remember is that He sees my heart. He sees that longing inside of me to be more like Him, even if it's small. He sees the end from the beginning and knows where I've come from and where I'm going. I am by no means a finished product, but my position as daughter of the King and as the bride of Christ are fixed and set as long as my heart stays for Him. The cross was enough. He made a way and now it's my turn to respond. I pray that all of my days I live in the truth and the reality of Christ's finished work on the cross, and give Him the only response found worthy; a life set apart for simple and pure devotion to Jesus. Read the book if you haven't!